I was hesitant to share this personal journal entry but decided that I should. Earlier this year I had one of the worst bouts of panic/anxiety attacks that I've experienced in long time. For those of us that live with this struggle, we all know too well the chaos, doubts, and insecurities that come from it. Even the aftermath of the attacks can still be challenging. It was only learning to be honest with others when I was going through them, rather than masking them, that helped alleviate some of my anxiety. It's that sense of vulnerability and feeling safe that increases my level of anxieties. In slowly recovering from this recent one, I've learned a few things along this uncomfortable journey: that God loves me more than I could ever imagine especially during those dark moments, that my panic attacks are not signs of weaknesses but simply an indication of my beautifully flawed nature, that it isn't something that just goes away but something I learn to manage, that people are ultimately loving, gracious and willing to help, that I'm not defined by what I struggle with but by how God sees me, that there is no quick cure for it, that you just can't snap out of it, and that although the past can still hurt in the present, the present is no longer the past and hope remains. It is my hope and prayers to those living with anything challenging that you know you are truly valued and you will be okay. Please learn to take care of yourself as I am learning too in this challenging journey.
“Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy and my burden is light.” -Matthew 11:28-30
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"The LORD your God will rejoice over you with gladness; he will quiet you by his love; he will exult over you with loud singing."